Jun.4.2001 #2

I'm at my mom's place, and she tells me that she has a convertible. I didn't know this, so I go out and take it. It's silver and sporty. For some reason I don't scoot the seat up and so I have trouble braking the car while also seeing over the dash. I'm wearing my sarong with a white tank top and sunglasses; my hair is tousled. On my left leg there is a huge tattoo. It's purpley and intricate and cool, all on the upper outside of my thigh.
I go to my house and there are all these people there-they're not circus folks, but they are weird, but in a good way. There's one midget. Everybody is dancing in the basement with the lights off, and I join them for a while. Then I go upstairs to my room, and I look at myself in the mirror and think how beautiful I am. There is no bed in the room.
The midget comes in and starts talking to me, he wants me to join their group, but I have to leave. I get in the car and drive to the stadium, where there is a game playing, and also Askimbo. I don't go to the stadium, but rather to a cafe across from it. I am sitting at a round table with my back to the door. Some woman joins me. I know her, but she introduces herself, and I tell her that we have already met several times before. Brian comes in and stands behind me with his hands on my shoulders. He kisses my head before returning to the band.
Soon I'm eating some bacon and Jason Struna enters. He has a jar full of clear liquid with a large piece of fatty bacon that looks like it has been preserved. Jason is very excited about being able to finally eat the bacon, but I am repulsed by it. I leave the cafe with Michaela. We are outsid on a grassy hill. There's a cement table with two benches at the top of the hill. As we pass by the table I see two cats fighting.
One cat is a grey Siamese, with striking blue eyes and a black tail. The other cat is mangy and an unidentifiable mix. The cats are fighting to the death. They are on the bench, right in front of us. The mangy cat bites the Siamese cat's throat and holds it's head down. The Siamese has it's claws in the mangy cat's throat. I can't see the cats' face, but the black tail of the Siamese suddenly stiffens, then spases and the cat falls dead. The mangy cat lets go of the dead animal's throat leaving it's lifeless body on the bench. The mangy cat is drenched in it's own blood, flowing from the holes in it's neck, and it staggers off to die.
I start heaving and vomitting bile. I'm dry heaving and can see the ground, my shoes, my bile falling, all this through my watery eyes. I notice an older couple who had also seen the fight; the husband is comforting his wife as she cries.

Jun.4.2001 #1

Brian picks me up, and we drop Liz off next to a park. Brian cuts through the park because we are low on gas. I'm upset with him because it is my car and he is driving recklessly. There's a garage at the bottom of this hill. There is only one pump, and it's currently in use, so we go inside. Everytime we go out to use the pump someone cuts in front of us. Brian finally just parks the car and we go inside for awhile. There's a bakery inside the garage.
When we go outside again we can't find the car. It's dark now and I'm emotionally exhausted, so I sit down. Brian's not there anymore and I can see the sky. After a while this man comes over to me. He's black, tall, skinny and flambouant. He tells me that he found my car.
I follow him to the top of the hill, to his house, which has a garage attached. Inside the garage there are 5 or 6 black men. I sit down and they ask me what color my car is. I say, "blue, dark blue, like the sky at night." The men like it and they all reply, "yes, like the sky."
The garage door opens and my car comes out, with pictures all over it. They are scenes that have been painted onto the car and superimposed over each scene is a woman, fully dressed with neon circles around her breasts. I laugh, and they laugh with me. I get up and walk over to the car, and start unconsciously scratching off the pictures. I then suddenly realize what an insult that must be and leave the rest.
I leave with my car to go get Brian from his mom's house, and on the way I get mad at him again for leaving me.